Another day of utter excitement. Looking for a new kitchen to cover up the feature wall, the feature wall being a ruddy great hole where a gas boiler once was. Currently considering putting large frame round said hole and calling it an installation. Would be considerably cheaper than a kitchen. As a sop to the child who is a reluctant shopper I promised a trip to the pet shop to LOOK. No way are any animals to be bought. She is very partial to small furry beasties. Favourite furry beastie today was a black baby rabbit with a strange mane. Charlotte named him Elvis. It's unwise to name a rabbit you hardly know and are very unlikely to get your Dad to buy. I would have bought Elvis, he was cute and I'm weak. Her Dad was not for moving. 'Charlotte, you find an animal that doesn't crap and you can have it, cause I'm the one that is always left to clean up the s***' No sign of weakness there then. She has come home and drawn some of the animals that would make an acceptable new pet. Pretty much everything that was in the pet shop. I'm warming to the idea of Brian the rat. Wonder how much rats poo?

A long long time ago.

Tis a long time since I posted. I defected to Facebook. Today's is New Year's Day. We are in hibernation mode which means a lot of telly is being watched. I wouldn't want to give you the impression that this is entirely a blissful affair there is a slight war of attrition going on to see who can do the most of nothingness. There is a degree of resentment towards all domestic duties and a custody battle over the remote. We always get ratty with each other at this time of the year, a terrible confession but true, too much time in confined spaces. That and the fact Char wants to watch The Simpsons 24/7. I've made no resolutions. Char had two ice creams and resolved to be 'more herself'. I'm not sure I can take it if she's any more herself than she already is. I'd be happy if she'd resolve to take her roller boots off indoors.

So I remember that sunshine does exist...

We had a holiday. It was sunny. We liked sunny. It should be more sunny more often. Could someone fix that for me please?

A little something for Burns Night

So it's Burns night and as tradition would have it small people all across the land are learning poems in the 'mither' tongue in the great man's honour (this too happened in my day, still traumatised by having to commit 'The puddock' to memory but that's another story). There is a competitive edge to this as the best recital wins something (not clear what that might be).Twiglet has been learning a poem by Sheena Blackhall, writer in residence at Aberdeen University. Here is her rendition. This spirited recital has landed her the final. For those unfamiliar with some of the language (like me) it's essentially a poem about snot and phlegm.

They came, they saw....

They boogied until they were fit to drop. It was a rare pleasure to have the Twigs cousins to visit. An even rarer pleasure to watch them shaking their bootys out to 'just dance'. I also have footage of Ian breaking out some moves but am not publishing it yet - it's too useful as a bribe and I may need some tea and toast later. He he.

New Year

So after living in the delightful Stonehaven for nearly 7 years we finally managed to stay awake - through sheer stubborness on the Twiglets part - long enough to see the fireballs.

Fairly spectacular so it was. Slightly scary how near they come to you with their homemade wire mesh contraptions full of highly combustible material and it's best not to think about what might happen if one of them was to fly out of their hands. Surprising really in this health and saftey obsessed world that they still get away with it. Twiglet also got to witness her first really drunk teenagers with a girl collapsed in the street and a few lads aptly demonstrating a good old fashioned drunken stumble. With any luck it'll put her off for life. It is however fair to say that by the end of it she was completely knackered. Behold the dead fish that couldn't make it up the stairs to bed. Good job she already had her jammies on under all that lot. Happy new year.

Things to do on your holidays (Part 1)

Enjoy some quiet time contemplating the beauty of nature...


Spend some quality time with the family (in a caravan????)


Spend some time with friends. Goggles are optional.